me, auf deutsch

i had the pleasure of speaking this morning with someone who either couldn't or flat out refused to speak english with me, for a good few hours. it was pretty awesome. but now looking back on it, some elements are floating to the surface concerning how i comport myself while using the german language.

first off- i'm not very verbal. this is obviously due to a lack of confidence in using the language casually and, probably more than i'd like to admit, due to a lack of vocabulary. so i say very little. i answer questions, often haltingly, often requesting that the question be repeated. sometimes i ask questions but definitely less frequently than i would if i were having a conversation in english.

i have to listen very, very actively. i have to try to hear, comprehend and analyse each word as it's said, then synthesize the words and rearrange them to fit my english-thinking schema. all in a matter of seconds. then, also in a matter of seconds, i have to form a response, using words the way i THINK they're supposed to be used (i'm often wrong) and at the same time i have to attempt the proper pronunciation of these words as well. i have to try to speak at a seemingly normal pace, which is nothing close to the pace of my english conversations.

most importantly, i have to try really hard. i have a hard enough time in english getting my point across or expressing myself. in another language it's basically torture. and it's really hard to be funny. at least, intentionally.

but all this is part of the process i'm sure. despite the fact my formal education in german might well be over, i don't think i'll ever stop learning (trying to learn) german. i find the language itself too fascinating to give up, and i have too many amazing friends of the german persuasion that i'll always want to keep in my life who will motivate me to want to communicate better with them in their own language.

I woke up this morning around 9, with the sun beating down mercilessly through the window onto my legs. Luckily I got an early night last night, but it wasn't for lack of fun.

I spent all of yesterday with my friend Miriam, who came by around noon so I could edit her bachelor's thesis,which is in English. I should only hope that someday, maybe in around 30 years or so, my Deutsch will be as academic as her English!

After the work was done, we set out into the city to gawk at Goths. Annually, Leipzig holds the worlds largest conference of Gothic types, it's a festival called Wave Gothik Treffen. Because it's a massive gathering of freaks, it's naturally a terrific people-watching opportunity. I saw some really cool, really outlandish, and also really disgusting things yesterday. Here are some pics for proof.

P.L.U.R. goths

mistress/slave

Zombie Princess

Connewitz tram stop, right near my Wohnung

In addition to goth-stalking, we also had ice cream, saw a jazz concert, and met up with Miri's lovely friend Janine (who runs THIS SITE) for drinks and creme brulee at the bar near the Skala/Central Theater.

In all, a perfectly lovely day. Today I'm looking forward to an "afterparty", which my friend Ashley said she'd inform me of if she found out (they're kind of secretive/illegal.) We'll see. As for now, I'm going to make some coffee and chill out after an hour and a half of German practice.

bright side.

 Things are looking up since last post. I had a very... interesting... weekend, with some rather unexpected outcomes. I partied at a rave under a bridge (or, as Tracy aptly named it, a "Troll Rave")

Troll Rave DJ's.

Troll Rave Sunrise! 

The next day I partied at the Hochinstitut für Grafik und Buchkunst (in 2 words- art school.) The "HGB," as it's known, is a gorgeous building that looks like this inside, and like this outside. It's one of the oldest art schools in Europe, established in 1764. Their photography program is really super.

I had a class there last semester that I kind of stopped going to because it became apparent that I was at the time very much over my head in that I would have had to give a presentation (in German) on a DDR photographer. I could probably (maybe?) have done it this semester but now Tracy's gone I sort of lost the will.

Anyhow, on Saturday the students of the HGB held their annual shindig, and it was really super. The whole building was a great big partay. I hung out mostly with one of the Erasmus kids, Kaarle, and we had a grand ol' time.

 Both  Friday and Saturday "evening" ended around 6:30 or 7 the next morning. Hardcore party time. I couldn't agree more with that line in the LCD Soundsystem song called "North American Scum" about partying in Germany (well, namely Berlin but it really describes the whole country I think) "we can't have parties like in Spain where they go all night, or like Berlin where they go another night." However, although the parties generally DO go on for 2 nights in a row, I, being said North American Scum, am not quite accustomed to such debauchery. So six in the AM is generally enough for me. Despite my inability to party like a true German, ich hatte viel spaß gemacht. 


In other good news, I found out I should be soon to receive my TAP grant, and also a replacement for my DX3000. I feel like I'm missing an arm when I"m without my camera! It's painful. I have a little canon powershot digital elf, but once you've had your hands on a DSLR it's really depressing to have to go back. So I'm eagerly awaiting both of those things that will ostensibly improve my quality of life in my remaining time in Germany.

Also I've got loads of work to do for Uni, including a Referat (oral presentation) for my Konversation class. I decided my topic will be DDR photography, since I did attend that class back in the Fall, at least now I can make it count for something!

Toronto Ontario from the air...

The flight to Berlin from London was as to be expected- short and sweet. Unfortunately I was sandwiched into a window seat by a hulking, sleeping American couple with no chance for escape, despite rows of completely empty seats begging me to lie across them.

When we arrive in Berlin, we passengers stream through the hallway and a cacophony of digital noise belts out of every hand and pocket, as Germans begin receiving the texts they must have missed since entering the Flugzeug. Dings and bells and whistles of all kinds whizz around my ears. Slowly we shuffle forward, as my stomach sinks anticipating the inevitable customs inspection. And for the second time in a row when arriving in Berlin, der Polizei say NICHTS to me. Not a single word. Just scan my P-Port, flip through the pages, stamp and send me off with a nod. A girl could get used to this.

Exiting the terminal puts me face to face with the second gorgeous sunset I’ve witnessed in two days, the sky a pale glowing blue with steam clouds sent up from some distant Fabrik, framed in luminous pink. I try to get a few shots but the light is hard to capture.

Steam

On the bus now, headed towards Peggy, hopefully Tracy, and possibly a nap. Finally back in Germany, and I’m feeling completely and utterly at home. I didn’t think it would feel this good! Any trace of melancholy I expected to feel at leaving my homeland melted away when I saw the TV Tower looming above the city from the plane.  As I lumber on to the bus with my suitcase trailing behind me, I ask the driver how much the fare costs. He promptly and jovially corrects my German and flashes a smile.

Deutschland, ich habe dich vermisst.

1,000 plus!

First off, I have to say I am well pleased... the blog has reached 1,000+ hits! Thanks for looking! Please don't be shy... leave me a comment, let me know who you are and/or what you think. I truly do appreciate you taking time to stop by here.

The past few days have been really super-spectacular. I think I'll start with today and work backwards.

I had my first exam this afternoon... Grammar. Ugggh. I think it went pretty well, though, on the whole. After class I walked over to the train station (inside of which is a massive shopping center) and picked up a bottle of almond syrup and a milk frother, in order to be able to make myself London Fogs a la my lovely friend Jim's favorite Starbucks bevvie. Once home and with said beverage created (unfortunately there's a lot of room for improvement in my technique,) I settled down into a Gmail phone chat with my mom and type up this here blog. An excellent way to spend a chilly evening.

Yesterday I just hung about the apartment, doing not-much-of-anything all day until my GDR photography class. After that was over Tracy and I decided to try this place near the Universität called Maza Pita for dinner- excellent find on her part, it was DEEEELISH. I got a maza plate with baba ganoush, hummus, and lebneh. Yum.  I luuuuurve Mediterranean food.

After dinner Tracy, Melinda and I walked over to Petersbogen to see HARRY POTTER und der Heilige der Todes (or whatever the heck it's called in German.) and it was maaaagnificent.

HP7

I was so, so impressed with the film. It was definitely too scary for kids (I was thinking of the Reading clan the whole time,) and there were some pretty randy moments too, but on the whole it was incredible. Thankfully we waited to watch it in English, because it would have lost so much without the original voices of the actors. I'm really not much for over-dubbed films.

Which, since we're moving backwards, brings us to the weekend, happily spent split between my two Berlinerin friends Peggy and Kristy. I had a blast, as I always do in Berlin with such wonderful friends and exciting surroundings. Friday I walked around the city by myself for hours, snapping a million photos and generally being a tourist.

Siegessäule

Brandenburger Tor

 I picked up a Christmas gift for my baby bro and took in the Color Fields exhibit at Deutsche Guggenheim.

Stella @ Berlin Guggenheim

After a thoroughly satisfying Stadtrundfährt (city tour) I met Kristy around 23.00 at Warschauerstraße and we began our adventures in Kreuzberg, starting off after Berliner (donuts) at our favorite watering hole, Fuchsbau. However, it ended up being much too crowded and not as appealing a scene as our last visit there, so we ventured across the street where we encountered a fantastic DJ spinning some incredible 90's R&B and HipHop and loads of people dancing. It was the perfect spot to start off our night.

The DJ in this bar was so spot on.

Kristy as Jumpin' Jack Flash...

Friday night lasted well into Saturday morning with Kristy and her friends, "the Danish boys," as she refers to them, and a couple of their breathtaking girlfriends at a pub called "ä" in Neukölln.

Danish specimen.

I finally flopped into bed around 7am at Peggy's. I am so lucky to have the amazing friends that I do! There aren't many people as hospitable as the divine Ms. Peg.

Kaffee und Blümen

When I finally woke up in the afternoon, Peggy made some coffee and we sat and had a really nice chat. She's such a sweet and remarkably intelligent person. I'm so grateful to have been introduced to her (thanks Abby!)

Later on Saturday I met up with Elli (a Leipzig friend) and her buddy Jonas at the Warschauerstraße Ubahn station. We had a heiße Schokolade together inside a cafe as an anti-fascist/anit-Nazi demonstration marched by.

Heiße Schokolade mit Sahne

 I ran outside with my camera and made myself a right fool in the name of journalism, jumping up on a chair and taking photos as the crowd marched by chanting and blaring a White Stripes song (maybe it was Icky Thump? I don't remember...) from a huge set of speakers on a truck.

Anti-Fascism march through Friedrichshain

The three of us parted ways soon after finishing our hot chocolates, as Elli was off to see Interpol after having interviewed the band for motor.de earlier in the day.

Alone again, I headed further into Friedrichshain down Simon-Dach Straße and was greeted by Kristy in front of her local cafe, DachKammer. It was one of those lovely, warm, homey sort of places, and we snuggled down for a chat in an antique couch.

DK, Kristy's local coffee shop

After Kristy finished her cappucino we headed to her apartment and acted like complete and utter girls, quatschen (chatting), cooking, listening to music and dying Kristy's hair an intense shade of copper, which I was thrilled to do for her. She was so happy with the results!

We took it easy Saturday night, sticking mostly to Kristy's Friedrichshain nabe and some nearby spots in Kreuzberg, getting home around 3am desperate for pommes mit majo (french fries with mayonnaise,) as the nearby döner place was fresh out. Ever resourceful, Kristy sliced up some potatoes and popped them in the oven, and I whipped up some homemade mayo.

Don't have any mayonnaise? Whip up some homemade at 3:30 AM! 

Sated, we went to sleep with intentions of rising early for the Mauerpark Flöhmarkt (flea market,) and early we did rise, to a bright, crisp sunny Berlin Mittag (Yes. Waking up at noon is early.) We got ourselves pretty and headed out to do some filming for her upcoming documentary, and captured a few shots she'd been wanting to film. After the "work" was done, we took the Straßenbahn to Mauerpark, hoping for the famous Mauerpark Karaoke.

The crowd mourns the lack of Karaoke... or maybe that was just me.

Unfortunately it wasn't going on, probably due to the onset of winter, so instead we frittered away what short amount of daylight there was in a cozy log cabin in the middle of Mauerpark.

Log cabin in Mauerpark.

Glühwein-vision

Kristy, her friend Marie and Marie's Spanish friend and I spent the whole evening drinking Glühwein, which is warm mulled wine. It's called "glow wine" I suppose because of the lovely glowing feeling it gives! Half of mine and Kristy's time was spent making eyes across the table at a group of gorgeous German boys, of which there is no shortage in Berlin.

I was trying to move backwards through this post but I did the weekend in chronological order, so it's with hearty apologies that I skip back to Thursday.

I met my friend Elli in Connewitzer Kreuz here in Leipzig and we headed off to Conne Island where the British band Blood Red Shoes were playing. The plan was, Elli would interview the band and I would be her photographer. I was/am so grateful for that experience! It was so much fun. I hadn't heard of the band before Elli invited me to the show, and I'm happy to report that they were just as great as Elli said they'd be. We met Laura, the guitarist/singer, before the show and Elli conducted an interview with her. I sat at the table adjacent them and snapped a few shots but mostly just felt sort of awkward and intrusive, and tried to be very quiet and not interrupt. I got to take a few shots of Laura and her bandmate Steve.

Steve and Laura

The band is comprised of just the two of them, they both sing and Steve plays drums, though during the encore of the show they did switch off and showcase how multi-talented they both are! During the show I was granted access to the photo pit, but being an ABSOLUTE amateur, I didn't realize photographers could only be in the pit for the first three songs of the set, and so I missed my chance. I still did get some first class shots from my spot in the crowd, using motor.de's Nikon D60. You can read (if you can read German) Elli's interview with Laura of Blood Red Shoes here. I'm really hoping to be able to collaborate more with Elli as her photographer- it was an absolute blast!

Straight rocking.

Laura shreds.

After the show we hung out with Steve, whose exuberant energy and open, positive attitude was remarkable to watch. The night ended, as ever, with POMMES MIT MAJO! Oh, and lots more wine back at Elli's house.

As for the upcoming week, tomorrow Tracy and I plan on taking in Menomena at Skala here in Leipzig. I'll happily report on the show if we end up going. Of course, Thursday is Thanksgiving so the Americans here are of course going to put out all the stops for a delicious meal and share with our British and German buddies. I can't wait for the parade!

Well, that's all for now. Thanks again for reading. I can't believe it, more than 1,000 hits! Yay! V. cool. Hope you keep coming back.

ich liebe der 'schland...

This week has been uneventful in a good way. Shlepping myself to classes, buying crap like new makeup and a shower scrubbie thing at the drug store, reading magazines, listening to Podcasts, thinking about my future (ugh.) and of course, trying desperately to get some of this language to sink in. In so many ways I love German... I find it charming that it uses forms like "thee" and "thou" and words equivalent to "hither" and "thither" and also phrases things; "I like it not" or "that goes not" instead of "I don't like it" or "that doesn't go" oh, and also the word "one" to refer to the collective "you." It's all very medieval and somehow romantic. But it also doesn't really make sense in my brain, and most especially when I open my mouth to let words fall out. Generally that doesn't go very well.

So I was pleasantly surprised when I was able to (almost... kind of... sort of) engage in a conversation with the lady at the Ausländerbehörde, or Foreign Office, where I was applying for a visa today. See, living in Germany is totally cool, no problem, do as you like... for three whole months. However, if you want to stay longer, you have to get a visa, which in theory, shouldn't be a problem for someone studying here. In theory. However, the reality is that in order to stay, one must have a whole crap-load of money in the bank, around the tune of €6.380 (six thousand three hundred eighty euros... German uses a dot in numbers where we in English use a comma and vice versa...) Multiply that by the current € to $ exchange rate and... ouch. Obviously, I do not have this kind of dough sitting in the bank, let alone in my German bank account. So, in order to get my student visa and be allowed to stay in the country for the appropriate amount of time, I need to prove my financial independence. 

In order to do this, I can hopefully get Financial Aid at school to fax something over to "vouch" for the fact that this money is really coming to me. But who knows. The only thing I'm sure about in this situation is that my legal stay is ending in less than a month. So that's kind of stressing me out.

Other than that, things are good. My classes are great. I take two "real" university courses at Uni Leipzig. The first is Deutsche Demokratik Republik/Bundesrepublik Deutschland Foto, in which we look at and learn about photography in the GDR (socialist) and BRD (capitalist) mostly in the 60's, 70's and 80's. The other is a module called "Englisch Unterricht," which is teaching English to German kids. The seminar is in English, the lecture is entirely in German, and aside from my friend Melinda, everyone in the module is German.

My other two classes are in the category of German as a Foreign Language, one being Phonetics and the other Grammar. Altogether it's a pretty light load, to be honest. I dropped one course, Deutsch für Geisteswissenschaftler, because I found it tedious and boring and it interfered with my ability to attend observation at the middle school for the Teaching English module.

Now I get to spend my Monday afternoons hanging out with little rascals at Apollonia Mittelschule in Connewitzer Kreuz. I totally love it. I'm obligated not to say anything about any of the kids personally, but as a whole, they are a lovely bunch, and I feel like I'm accomplishing something more meaningful to my degree when I'm actually in a classroom, even though it's not an art classroom. Kids are kids and classroom management is classroom management so there's definitely going to be something to learn. 

Over the fondue pot...

Tonight my lovely mitbewohnerin (roommate) invited me to eat dinner with her and a group of her friends. It was so sweet of her to invite me, and the fondue was absolutely delicious. But unfortunately, I am still an absolute failure in social situations with Germans. My German speaking abilities are so rudimentary that it's laughable and inevitably embarrassing. I do think they give me a break... I try to make it clear I haven't studied all that much German and that I've only been here for a few weeks. Yet I still find my cheeks burning whenever someone asks me what, presumably, is a very simple question. Something like "Where do you come from?" can trip me up so much it's ridiculous. I know it's my problem entirely, and that no one is judging me harshly for not understanding... but having to ask "Wie bitte?" (pardon me?) 3 times when someone asks a third grade level question is just not cool. 

Last night I had a conversation at the kneipe (bar) with my friend James about stepping outside ones comfort zone... that it's important to do so because otherwise one finds themselves trapped in a very staid existence. I heartily agree, and therefore found it important to accept tonight's invitation to dinner with 7 German speakers rather than booking it to a place where I could speak English with other Americans. It was sort of difficult, and I couldn't really understand the nuances of the conversations, but I could get the general idea. It's nice to hear a stream of conversation and be able to pick up one out of every four or five words. I feel like I'm improving despite myself and I think being in just that sort of situation is exactly what I need. Despite how embarrassing it can sometimes feel.


Language barrier aside, things have been going well here in Leipzig. I couldn't be happier. I have a room in a really lovely apartment with two other girls, I am enrolled in some very awesome classes at the Universität (one of which is a pedagogic class!) and I have made friends with some truly wonderful people. I have nothing to complain about. I just hope my German speaking/understanding picks up more quickly than it has been so far.