Tuesday, November 16, 2010

16.11.10

Right now there are seven mugs, three glasses, two plates and four empty bottles in my bedroom.
I'm even not sure what I'm doing here.
Running away, I guess.
Very early this morning I had a horrifying nightmare.
Most of yesterday I felt ashamed of myself. Of my lack of accomplishment. Many people at twenty have achieved more than I could dream of at nearly thirty.
I don't like to let myself give in to this. I try to remain positive.
Giving in to these feelings of inadequacy causes nightmares.
Although really what caused the nightmare was sleeping on too many pillows. It was a mental manifestation of physical pain.
I dreamt I was choked with a necklace I own.
I almost wore that necklace today, just to show it who's boss.
But I didn't.

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